JENNY LANE - WRITER
SYMPTOMS OF GROWTH
We thought the bleeding was the turn of womanhood
The sudden uncontrollable dampness,
the ache of an organ we had never felt before -
the rush of wanting another, desire suddenly having meaning.
We settled into this new body, this cocoon of chaos
Accepted that this would last for years
and could combat the symptoms that came with it.
We believed it was the peak of growth.
Yet now, there is something different
- something emerging on us, forcing us
to realise that our body clock isn’t what we thought
and instead, is beyond our control.
It crept up, lapping up the little attention we gave it,
growing in a small spot that we couldn’t quite identity.
A swelling of our subconsciousness. A craving.
- a habit of the female mind.
It hides in the ends of the hair follicles,
spreads in the stomach and pinches at the weight of our eyes.
It wipes the memory, clearing space for a new room
where it will manifest without privacy.
And now we look in the mirror a little too long
Searching for clarity in our skin
confused and wondering how long we have left
before our youth replaces us for another.